The Secret I Kept for Thirty Years: How I Finally Took Back Control of My Life
I would love to raise a topic with you that I think many people struggle with but are hesitant to speak about.
For most of my childhood, I was as regular as clockwork. I never thought about my bowel movements — they were simply something my body did.
A little note before I begin: This is my personal story and what ultimately worked for me after many years of struggling with constipation and laxative dependence. It is not intended as medical advice, and everyone's circumstances are different. Chronic constipation can have many different causes, so if you are experiencing ongoing problems or relying on laxatives, please speak to a healthcare professional before making any changes to your treatment.
The Trap of the Quick Fix
When I started building my own life as a young adult, I thought I could do with losing a few kilograms, and now that I was living on my own and no longer had my parents watching over me, I could do what I wanted. I discovered crash diets. I researched these diets, and it fascinated me that most of them promised quick weight-loss results without too much effort. I was always disciplined, and I was excited. I could do this. At one point, I lived on little more than grapes and water for weeks at a time. The weight fell off quickly, and at the time, that felt like a victory. What I did not realise was that I was also beginning a relationship with constipation and laxatives that would continue for decades.
Living a Secret Life
By my late twenties, laxatives had become part of my life. My bowel simply could not function normally without them. Eventually, I became completely dependent on them. And the saddest part? My life began to revolve around my colon. For decades, I found myself planning my social life around my digestive system. I missed many social events because I had to “see to my colon” — I always came up with some silly excuse. It was my little secret. Something as simple as going away for a few days could become an exercise in planning around my bowels. I rarely talked about it. Who does?
The Turning Point
For years, I simply accepted that this was how my life was going to be. And it was, for at least thirty years. Then, a few years ago, we were planning an overseas holiday. Not a quick little getaway, either — we were going to be away for three weeks. And I remember thinking: something needs to change. I could not imagine spending three weeks trying to enjoy a holiday while worrying about my bowels, wondering when I would be able to go, and relying on laxatives to make things happen.
I did not want to spend another holiday planning my life around my colon. So, for the first time, I made a conscious decision: I was going to find a solution that worked. Not another quick fix. Not something that would simply get me through a few days. I wanted to understand what was happening and find a way of getting my body working normally again. And that decision changed everything.
What I Came to Understand
I wanted to understand what might have happened to my body over those thirty years. When you rely on stimulant laxatives, your colon essentially becomes lazy. It is a muscle, and because the laxatives were doing all the heavy lifting, my own muscles had forgotten how to work. Whenever I did not have a bowel movement within a day or two, I would get anxious, and grab another laxative — trapping myself in a vicious, artificial cycle.
Determined to break free, I tried everything. I consulted a general practitioner who specialised in a holistic, integrative approach rooted in functional medicine. I spent a great deal of money there, but she could not solve my problem. Then my gynaecologist suggested a treatment called Movicol. It helped for a while, but it still felt like a temporary fix.
Finding What Worked for Me
However, this time I was not going to give up and return to that vicious cycle. The universe must have been in alignment, because a friend told me about her own success with two natural health products: Aim Herbal Fiberblend and Prosit. She gave me some crucial advice that changed everything: I had to drink at least two litres of water every single day, eat a fibre-dense diet and exercise. Most importantly of all, she told me I had to give my body time.
I decided to trust the process. After about a week, something happened that I honestly had not expected: my body started working naturally again. It sounds utterly unbelievable after three decades of struggle, but for the past three years, the very first thing I need to do when I wake up every morning is go to the bathroom. Naturally. I still take Aim Herbal Fiberblend and Prosit every day. Perhaps a little of the anxiety from all those years remains, and I am not quite ready to let go of the routine that finally gave me my freedom. My gynaecologist has also reassured me that, in my particular case, she is comfortable with me continuing to take them long-term.
I want to be very clear that I am sharing what worked for me, not prescribing a solution for anyone else. Both products contain a combination of herbal ingredients, and Aim Herbal Fiberblend includes cascara sagrada, while Prosit contains Aloe ferox, both of which can have laxative effects. If you are struggling with chronic constipation or regularly using laxatives or herbal laxative products, I would strongly recommend discussing your individual situation with a healthcare professional.
What changed for me was not simply finding two products. It was developing a consistent routine of fibre, plenty of water, exercise and — perhaps most importantly — learning to give my body time instead of anxiously reaching for a quick fix.
After thirty years of struggle, that change has been enormous.
I cannot actually describe how profoundly this has changed my life. Some people may find this strange, but the relief I felt — and still feel — is exhilarating. For the first time in decades, I no longer have to think about whether my body is going to cooperate. I don't have to plan my social life around my colon. I don't have to worry about travelling. I simply get up in the morning, and my body does what it needs to do. I got my freedom back.
A Message to Anyone Secretly Struggling
If you are reading this and secretly carrying the same heavy burden that I did for thirty years, please know that you are not alone. You do not necessarily have to accept this as your forever reality. Bodies are remarkably resilient, but they also need kindness, consistency and time. Please don't be embarrassed to talk about it. Chronic constipation can have many different causes, and if you are experiencing ongoing problems or relying on laxatives, it is important to speak to a healthcare professional before making changes to your treatment.
But above all, don't give up hope. If I could reclaim my freedom after three decades, I truly believe there can be a way forward for you too.
🌿 Continue Your Journey
If this blog resonated with you, here are three more stories you might enjoy:
Why I Finally Walked Away From Dieting — because my years of restrictive eating and dieting were the beginning of a much bigger struggle with my relationship with food and my body. This is where I share why I finally decided to stop fighting myself and choose nourishment instead.
Are You Really Hungry? Learning to Listen to Your Body — because sometimes our bodies are asking for food, and sometimes they are asking for something else entirely. Learning to recognise the difference changed the way I think about eating.
Hydration After Fifty: The Small Habit That Makes a Big Difference — because water plays a surprisingly important role in digestion and wellbeing. I share my own two-litre-a-day habit and why I learnt that fibre needs water to do its job properly.
Before You Go
Looking for a beautiful birthday wish, friendship greeting, or uplifting message to share with someone special?
Visit Frannie's Greeting Corner for a growing collection of heartfelt greeting cards designed to encourage, celebrate, and brighten someone's day.
— Frannie ☕
Comments